gigglesugar -- Byte-sized comedy.

Why Do We Scream at Each Other?

GiggleSugar — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 10:05:47 -0800

Dig if u will, a flow chart. This flow chart answers Prince's pressing question in "When Doves Cry": Why do we scream at each other? I shall print this out and carry it around with me for future reference. (Incidentally, I can do Prince's little dance routine at the end of the video. Just so you know.)

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Ronald McDonald Is a Perv

GiggleSugar — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 14:00:00 -0800

Also, what's with the weird overplucked brows? I never noticed them until now.

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The Original U-Haul

GiggleSugar — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 08:00:00 -0800

If you want something done right, just do it yourself!

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The "G" Stands For Golf

GiggleSugar — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 12:00:00 -0800

Is it just me, or does the phrase "as grooved as his horn" somehow manage to make both golf and saxophone playing sound dirty?

They Really Have a Way With Words

GiggleSugar — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 04:00:00 -0800

Perhaps if you are touting your online dating service as specializing in the art of conversation, you should check your advertisements for any major grammatical errors. Or perhaps, they used those pesky "algorithm's" to generate this sentence?

They Go Straight to Your Hips

GiggleSugar — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 14:00:00 -0800

I can think of at least two reasons why the words "asses" and "cookies" shouldn't appear on the same package. (Thanks for the awesome send, Nancita!)

Coolest Lawyer Ever

GiggleSugar — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 11:00:00 -0800

Peter "P Ta Mon" John could single-handedly change the reputation lawyers have in popular culture. Uptight, venal and corrupt? How about laid-back, cool, and well, stylin'? You can bet that if I ever had a major drug charge, had committed a serious felony (is there an unserious kind?), or required an "expungement" (I don't even know what that means), P Ta Mon would be the mon. Most definitely.

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(Hopelessly) Lost in Translation

GiggleSugar — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 04:00:00 -0800

There just aren't enough translators in this world to go around — and thank goodness for that, because these bizarre foreign interpretations are an endless source of WTF and LOL. So spritz on some anus perfume and check out some of my favorite incomprehensible signs.
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Now That's What I Call Lunchables!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 13:00:00 -0800

I bet this little critter would be tasty with some relish and mustard!

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Further Signs of the Dollar's Decline

GiggleSugar — Sat, 08 Nov 2008 01:00:00 -0800

When the value of money begins to drop, at least you can use it to doodle on! Turn the figures on your currency into Amy Winehouse, Ringo Starr, Heath Ledger's The Joker, and a bunch of zombies!

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Most Boring Magazine in the Universe Also Has the Best Name

GiggleSugar — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 11:00:00 -0800

You want to snooze when you read "Official Meeting Facilities Guide," but then you read "omfg" and you go, "OMFG!"

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Hilarious Halloween Costume

GiggleSugar — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 07:00:00 -0800

I've gotta remember this idea for next Halloween. This awesome guy dressed up as Chairman Mao — framed in a picture, and carrying his signature little red book. I wish I'd run into him on the BART!

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Pumpkin Proposal

GiggleSugar — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 08:00:00 -0700

Cute: proposing to your girlfriend via jack-o'-lantern. Not cute: having an all-costume Halloween wedding with a cake made out of Tootsie Rolls and Smarties.

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I Know Who I'm Voting For

GiggleSugar — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Now that's a ticket we can all get behind!

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Fire the Translator!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

One demon moustache squid roast, please. And supersize it!

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WTF?!

GiggleSugar — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 10:15:00 -0700

That's what you get for handing out raisins.

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Only If You Reeeally Have To Go

GiggleSugar — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 02:00:00 -0700

If you see people like this standing in line, I'd get out of their way.

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Smile and Say Hoo-ha

GiggleSugar — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 12:35:28 -0700

Oh, the college years . . . seems like they're gone in a flash.

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Who Needs the Weather Channel?

GiggleSugar — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 09:00:00 -0700

. . . when you have a magical stone to tell you what it's like outside. Or, you know, a window.

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Someone Give This Journalist a Job

GiggleSugar — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

She speaks the truth.

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Ruh Roh!

GiggleSugar — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 02:00:00 -0700

Isn't that what everyone wants when they graduate?

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An Abstinence Program That Just Might Work

GiggleSugar — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 15:00:00 -0700

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The Perfect Bling for a Hooptie

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 08:00:00 -0700

Again, I ask, who exactly at the DMV is approving these things?

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Another Streaker Amuses Himself at the Expense of My Eyeballs

GiggleSugar — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 14:20:00 -0700

What possesses dudes to take off their clothes, disrupt sporting events (in this case, a cricket match in Edgbaston, Birmingham in Central England), and flash their little willies? There's gotta be a name for this disorder. Any ideas, readers?

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Unfortunate Name #563

GiggleSugar — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 07:00:00 -0700

You know poor Mike here was teased mercilessly as a teen. So, Mike, I apologize in advance for prolonging your pain, but I just cannot help myself. Bwahahahaha!

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Your Face Here

GiggleSugar — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 14:00:00 -0700

The rich and famous aren't like you and me. They get to have faces in Life & Style magazine.

Pie Charts Made Simple

GiggleSugar — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 03:00:00 -0700

Mmmmm. Pie.

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Somebody Really Loves Scrabble!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

I mean, loved Scrabble.

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Moving Tip #28

GiggleSugar — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 14:00:00 -0700

I hate when that happens.

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I'm Lovin' It!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 04:00:00 -0700

Please tell me this is real.

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This Is One Way to Get Your Neighbors to Scoop Up After Their Dogs

GiggleSugar — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

The submitter of this charming "note" told Passive-Aggressive Notes that Mr. Apt. # 105 "lets his dog out, deposits her gifts on the sidewalk, and then runs back. Dude stands and watches her, perfectly at his ease.” He continues, “This has been going on for as long as I’ve lived here, so I guess someone finally got fed up.” That'll teach him!

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Someone's Waiting for His Bedtime Story

GiggleSugar — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 04:00:00 -0700

"Whatcha waitin' for? Can I hear Goodnight Moon tonight?"

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Cute Alert: Turtle Gets His Snack On

GiggleSugar — Sun, 14 Sep 2008 01:00:00 -0700

It's a mashed potato-eatin' toity! I heart him.

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Whasssuuuup?!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 04:00:00 -0700

Alternate title: 'Sup, dog? (Did someone give these pooches some coffee?)

Thanks, College Humor!

Have You Always Wanted to Be on the Cover of a Magazine?

GiggleSugar — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Well, here's your chance. Just upload a picture to this site and you're on your way to stardom! Look below to see a sampling of some Sugar ladies enjoying their 15 minutes of fame. And me in the People magazine cover there? That's actually real.

(FabSugar, CasaSugar, BuzzSugar, FitSugar, and GiggleSugar)

Suspicious Van of the Day

GiggleSugar — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 04:00:00 -0700

I doubt this will be a regular feature here, but it is on this awesome website GorillaMask found: Suspicious Vans. We see them all the time, lurking, needing a wash, and, as in this picture, being driven by a clown. Van + Clown = Suspicion Overload.

Sears Portrait Studios Are Branching Out!

GiggleSugar — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

It's not just cute kittens and kids in strange poses anymore. Hang ten, grams!

Thanks, College Humor!

Another Ruined Vacation Photo

GiggleSugar — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Why is some dude always butting in to good pictures?

Click here to see more pics!

Mr. Cruisin' Cooler Man Rules

GiggleSugar — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

BabySugar took these lovely sunset pics of a bitchin' dude tooling down the street in Houston on his CoolerMobile (TM), with a lit cigarette in one hand and a beer between his strangely tan and hairless legs. Too bad the pics don't come with a soundtrack, as he was emitting Metallica ("Enter, Sandman" if you must know) from an unknown source. Aside from the beer (don't drink and drive!), this guy is my hero. I miss Texas.

Sad!

GiggleSugar — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 08:00:00 -0700

You kids don't know disappointment! Imagine if you will, an excited 5-year-old who thinks she's gonna grow an entire sea monkey colony of her very own! And what does she get instead? Brine shrimp. Near-microscopic lumpules of thingymajigs floating around dirty water. (Sorry, I had to share.)

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Cute Alert: Penguin Survey

GiggleSugar — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 04:00:00 -0700

Extremely satisfied is my guess.

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Children's Drawings Come to Life

GiggleSugar — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 08:00:00 -0700

These pictures make me happy! I wish I knew more about the details of this project, but I guess it's pretty self-evident. Take some kids' drawings, reenact them in all their innocent splendor, and then take a picture. Oh, yeah. And then post them on the Internet so folks like me can put them up for all to see. Wheee!

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Amazing Bento Boxes

GiggleSugar — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 12:00:00 -0700

Now these folks know how to play with their food! Lunch is one of my favorite parts of the day. It doesn't matter if I'm eating takeout, or if I brought a modest sandwich in the office to toast in our panini maker (mmmm, toasted sandwich!). The point is, lunch rules. Imagine if you made your lunch in the shape of cute animals and funny faces? I don't know if I can get behind blue rice, but mushrooms in the shape of birds flying into an egg yolk sunset? A sandwich with angry red bell pepper eyebrows? Sign me up!

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Chess on a Rollercoaster

GiggleSugar — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 08:00:00 -0700

Because stationary chess is for wusses.

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Boy Cats Are All the Same

GiggleSugar — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 08:00:00 -0700

I had to post this because a) I love the idea of a "husband kitteh" and b) I gotta give props to the "big hairy deal" formulation. That really is making something a big deal!

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Here's a Diagram I Can Understand

GiggleSugar — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 04:00:00 -0700

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Move Over Cats With Cheezburgers!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 10:20:00 -0700

There's some competition in town! And these dogs mean business.

Thanks, I Has a Hot Dog!

Introducing: The Homer Simpson Euro Coin

GiggleSugar — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 04:00:00 -0700

A Neatorama reader sent in this Euro coin he found in Spain with the face of King Juan Carlos I De Borbon y Borbon (whew!) altered to look like Homer Simpson. All of our coins should be modified in this manner. Who wants to see Roosevelt's and Lincoln's mugs! Bring me the heads of Kermit and Fozzie Bear!

The Honest Desktop

GiggleSugar — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 14:00:00 -0700

Although you've called your folder, "19th Century Love Poetry," it should probably really be called "Decoy Hidden-Porn Folder," or, in my case, "Cats in Glasses: A Gallery." Click here to see the entire honest desk top.

Thanks, College Humor!

What's Wrong With This Picture?

GiggleSugar — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Some people like nothing better than ruining other people's fun. Other people, like me, enjoy tsk-tsking this act, and then laughing at the result. Hypocritical? Probably. But it's my job.

Thanks, eBaum's World!