Whether he's explaining the height-to-drunk-to-funny ratio (shorter and drunker is funnier), the breakdown of who owns a Hummer (hint: douchebags, dildos, and .01 percent of poets), and at what point he will not listen to a cute girl talk about her cat, Demetri really does make it look easy. He's like the male Ellen DeGeneres. He turns the everyday into comedy gold.